For all of my life, Memorial day has held little meaning. I have seen the president speak at Arlington on TV, the flags flying at many houses. But for me, the holiday never had a face.
I visited my mother yesterday morning, and asked her if anyone in our family had ever died in service. She could not recollect any. She did revisit the forgotten story of how my dad and his twin brother lied about their age to go fight in WWII. Interesting, is seems that in todays age of suspect wars, the only lying going on is by those who would rather not go to battle...
This year, the holiday does have a face. My best friends sister died last year while serving in the National Guard. She was Kyles younger sister, I can remember when she was just a small child. I have been very close to this family and when she dies, it did feel like a member of my own family died. I consider myself one step removed, affected in my own level.
As I hiked through the forest yesterday, I thought a lot about what Memorial day means to those who lost a family member. I thought about how much I hate war, killing of any person, or animal for that matter. But, I still feel compelled to honor those who did died in a horrible war. Those people didn't start the war, they were doing what they believed was the right thing. They did it for their country, which has to be the most noble of deaths, if there is such a thing.
I remember a few weeks ago reading a column in the PI by Robert Jaimieson "War's fallen are too often forgotten".
I walk by the Garden of Remembrance every day. Its a daily reminder to me that war kills many people. There are quotes on the wall from letters of soldiers. One that gets to me every time I read it is by a soldier in WWII. He says something to the effect of "its too lovely of a time of year to be fighting a war". The soldier knew he could die any day, yet he still had time to take in the beauty of the earth.
I wondered today, how many people that walk right through the Garden to get to Starbucks, even know what all those names on the stone wall are? How many even care? I have always known and always cared.
To the face I can finally attach to this most solemn of all US Holidays, I say thank you Kirsten for all that you have done for our country.
1 comment:
She loved you too Craig and would greatly appreciate your kind words. Obviously this is still a fresh wound for me and a difficult situation. As you know I was lucky enough to speak to her the night before she passed away and she was the happiest that I had heard her in years. She was filled with pride at serving her country. She was also a veteran of the 1st Gulf War with the US Air Force and her rejoining the military through the National Guard gave her life a higher purpose which she was thrilled to be a part of.
She also was well aware that I did not want her to join (as if a brother has such influence). I vehemently tried to talk her out of it for many reasons which I will not go into at this time. Regardless, I respected her decision and thoroughly supported her after her decision was made.
As with any tragedy, it takes time for those of us who remain to make peace with the untimely passing of anyone close to us. I will say that the one thing that makes that process somewhat easier in this case is that I know she believed in what she was doing. She was happy. She was proud. She was doing exactly what she wanted to do.
Thanks for your memorial here because she is worth remembering; just as every other single person who gives their life while on active duty in the military. All of these people deserve our respect and thanks because we live as we live due to their sacrifice.
I love you Kirsten, I miss you and hopefully when I die, I can say that I also was doing exactly what I wanted to be doing.
Thanks again brother Craig.
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